The Pain Of Not Knowing
by Rill with a view
Summary: Peri is only just coping. How much worse are things for those whom she's left behind?


A short self explanatory short story. It's rather darker than the stories that I usually write, so it's a bit of an experiment for me. As always, I don't own the characters of the Doctor or Peri. Actually, come to think of it, I don't own any of the characters in this one! Enjoy…

The Pain Of Not Knowing

Peri was suffering from a pounding headache. It was over six feet tall, with blond curly hair and the most appalling dress sense imaginable. And it had very recently tried to kill her.

Peri laid back on her bed pondering her future. What nightmare had see stumbled into? Hopping aboard the TARDIS had seemed like a pretty good idea at the time. But now she wasn't so sure. She'd wanted adventure, that's why she'd agreed to travel to Morocco with those two cute English guys. Well thanks to Howard that had all fallen through with a vengeance. Damn that man! This was all his fault. Well, her mother's fault too. Her mother quite clearly lacked taste, what self respecting woman would pick a creep like Howard Foster? Hell, the thought of the two of them together was enough to make anyone's skin crawl for miles. Peri shuddered involuntarily. She sure wasn't going to end up with a man like that. If bad taste ran in the family it was just going to have to skip a generation.

Determination. That felt good. She'd show them. She couldn't help wondering what had become of Howard though. Were he and her mother still together or had Peri's disappearance split them? After all, Howard had been the last person to see her before she went missing. Missing presumed drowned? Peri sobbed as she thought about what her mother must have gone through , to lose her daughter in such a tragic way. She wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. Perhaps it wasn't as bad as all that? Howard must've told her mother about the Morocco plan, right? Yeah, he must have. Knowing Howard he'd probably have gloated and boasted for hours about how clever he'd been in stopping her little adventure. That's how it must've been. 

Peri could see the whole scene in her mind. Her mother sat there, smiling with relief, happy that Howard had been able to stop such a foolish jaunt. Kissing him warmly and telling him how wonderful he'd been. Yeah, like he of all people really needed an ego boost! Evening would've turned to night. Still no sign of Peri. But no need to worry just yet. She was probably licking her wounds in the bars wasn't she, feeling too humiliated to return to the hotel in any hurry? Then in the morning the sun would have risen, casting it's light into Peri's still and empty bedroom. Where could the girl be now? How long did she need to cool off, for God's sake? Time to search the island. Where should they start looking? Who were Peri's friends? No idea. Why hadn't she paid more attention to her daughter? A couple of days spent searching and then the real feeling of panic would have set in. A huge knot of fear in the pit of her stomach that just wouldn't untie. Where was Peri!!! What had really happened out on that boat? Had Howard told her the full story. Oh my God! Perhaps he'd…. No, no, no , no! She mustn't think such things. Howard wasn't like that. Peri would turn up again. Peri was still alive. She just had to be.

Peri winced in pain as she followed her mother's thought processes through to their logical conclusion. Her mother thought she was dead. There was no way round that. No, wait a moment. Howard was always a damn good liar. Perhaps he'd have been able to convince her that everything was OK? 

"Peri isn't dead. No, she's just managed to find another way of getting to Morocco. She's a very resourceful girl, she gets that from you darling." 

The smarmy little… Peri felt like slapping her stepfather, just thinking about the likely conversation. Doubtless Howard, too, thought that she was dead, but so long as he could cover his own stinking back and save his wretched skin everything would be fine. Fine for three months anyway. Until the start of the new semester.

Peri sat up with a jolt. The time factor. This was a time machine after all. As long as she arrived back on Earth before the start of the next semester it'd all turn out right. Could she guarantee that though? Getting back on time? Before he'd changed… Changed? Ha! That was putting it mildly. But before, with the old Doctor, she'd felt sure that she'd be able to get home. How could you not trust a man like that? But this new version… How do you even start to trust a man who's tried to squeeze the very life out of you? A massive leap of faith that'll take. 

"I am the Doctor, whether you like it or not." 

That's what he'd said. Too much to take in. Far too much to hope for. She had to face it, she might never see her mother ever again… 

The End

Please feel free to leave your comments and review, all gratefully received be they good or bad. Mind you, I think I'll be heading back to the lighter material anyway! 


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